That the venus flytrap is very closely related to the vampire bat is
surely no longer in dispute. To consider this fruit of the Hells as a plant
betrays an ignorance that could be considered comical were it not so shamefully
at home in my own fair country.
Swallowing large birds and small deer without so much as a blush, the
venus flytrap is quite capable of the turning the most rational explorers
dreams into the fevered horrors of a Byronesque opiate reverie for decades.
This awful creature is extremely mobile but stays largely motionless to frustrate
scientific observers and potential predators, of which it has none. The boiled
stem of the Flytrap has a foul taste not unlike a Spitalfields whore's rennet,
if one's memory serves.
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