Wednesday, 13 November 2013

The Mongoose

Smelling like a derelict privvy and attacking only snakes and scorpions, the mongoose is not one of the animal kingdom’s great thinkers.
It is thought that the mongoose’s refusal to clean its fetid underside is due to its highly developed tastebuds, believed capable of detecting a claggy odour from weeks away.
It hides in well-ventilated bunkers, and commits suicide when placed under extreme duress, by franticly licking its hindquarters.
The mongoose disguises the entrance to its bunker by means of a screen of twigs, which it binds together using its extremely viscous ejaculata.

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